My
Beautiful Dream
I
want to see beautiful things.
I want to live in a beautiful place.
I want to be with beautiful people.
I want to believe that the whole world is beautiful.
I dream to fulfill this
fantasy of mine.
Dreaming takes me to a perfect world, where I could live without contact
with the outside world.
I want to dream forever so that my life is peaceful.
Only in my dream is my peaceful life possible.
However, one day, I die
in a dream.
In a department store I used to go with my mother and my sister, I am shot
by someone.
Who would shoot me and for what reason anyway?
It doesn't really matter because what strikes me is the fact that I am
going to die.
When I collapse by the escalator going up, I am looking at my pale face
with eyes wide open.
I feel my fingers getting cold and firm, convincing me that I am
approaching the end of my life but, surprisingly, without any fear or
sadness.
After I see my death, there is a darkness into which I fall without any
sound.
Then I wake up, never able to go back to sleep again.
So I am dead in a dream
now, and I have no choice but to live in this real world.
I have to live in the real world, where ugly people are doing terrible
things everywhere
However, I won't be devastated because I believe that the most beautiful
thing is to live in this devastating world and create something beautiful
out of the fears and ugliness existing in reality.
Kanako Okazaki
Yokohama, Japan
April 2003
